Years ago, some friends called me up asking me if I liked Ty Pennington. Hells yes I liked Ty Pennington! Trading Spaces was one of my favourite shows (don't judge!), so naturally when they told me that he was going to be at a local Chapters signing books I was all in.
When we got there, the entire upper level of the store was jam packed with people standing in a neverending lineup. We took a spot in line anyways and started moving at the pace of molasses.
While in the lineup, we were told that Ty would not be signing anything else but his books purchased from the store. We immediately hid the random objects that we had grabbed on our way out the door (which consisted of a hammer and a wooden ruler... since he IS the tool guy and none of us had ever purchased anything 'Ty Pennington' before!). We figured that at least one of us should have his book in our hands, so I took one off the nearby shelf.
Then, we were told that all books purchased at the store had to have an accompanying receipt that would be checked when we approached the signing table. Oh great... here I am holding an unpurchased book with no receipt and we were almost at the table! Thankfully, the girl behind us said she would lend me her receipt so we could go up.
When we got there, my friends whipped out the hammer and ruler for him to sign, and I whipped out my brand new copy of Ty's Tricks. By the way, this book is probably the most professional book I've laid eyes on... You know, nothing says "DIY" and "Home Renovation" like pictures of a half naked man in the shower with his pubes sticking out of his pants:
Now normally this would have just been a quick "here's your autograph, move along..." type experience... but not for rowdy young women like us. We took our sweet little time and started cracking dirty jokes with him about tools. He was hilarious and had some pretty good ones of his own. I mean, he's a pro at it... his book is just FULL of sexual innuendos:
I'm pretty sure we were up there for about 15 minutes joking around with him... and then my mother phoned... right in the middle of our "session". I told her I was talking to Ty Pennington at the moment and would call her back. Of course she knew who Ty Pennington was... she was a Trading Spaces fan too! At that moment, Ty said he wanted to talk to my mother. I gave him the phone and his dirty humor only continued when he started asking her what she was wearing among other things.
Before we left him alone, I had him sign the book. I obviously picked the most sophisticated page for him to sign:
Yep, so there you have it. "Dana, thx alot for all the love! I've got a tool for your box! Call me!" The hammer? Yeah, it's signed "Thanks for handling my tool!".
He told us we were the most fun and I'm pretty sure we made his day. So for all of you Ty Pennington fans, let me just say first hand that your ultimate tool guy is one dirty, dirty man and you should probably lock your daughters up. ;)
Oh, and I totally forgot to pay for the book... oops!